I have to admit that for years I could not understand how a close friend I had known for some time could get a divorce. After I myself got married, it became even harder to imagine him getting divorced, because I cannot imagine ever divorcing my own wife. But I finally figured it out. In…

Seminal crotch roach Seventh sign of the apocalypse: life-size pewter cowboy hat that holds chips in the brim and dip in the crown. “I like my beer dark and bitter, like my life.” -T “I like my teddy bears pink and slimy, just like my p*ssy.” -D Cupid and Psyche ganged up on little Mikey….

Ada basketball player Katelyn Carter sent the sports editor, and the sports writer, and me each a tin of flavored popcorn this week as a Christmas greeting and “thanks” for covering the Lady Cougars so far this season. On top of the container was a Coca Cola collectable holiday truck set. I opened it up…

I was a bit taken aback when I made this photo. I thought he had been assassinated by a disgruntled reindeer or sucked into the engine of a jumbo jet over the sea of Japan. I had no idea he was still alive. I had also heard that he was Agency, since he had unlimited…

  Sometimes when I tell people that I am a vegetarian, they ask me how I can resist the lure of meat, particularly the smell of meat. I can’t give them any kind of easy answer, because the question makes some important assumptions about me that are untrue. For example… I don’t, as a rule,…

She has a Christmas oranament that is made from a shotgun shell. She has three pewter Harley Davidson commemorative Christmas ornaments.

Abby was well enough to attend the annual Salvation Army Silver Tea with me Friday. The fund raiser was hosted this year by our long-time friends Kassie and Somerlyn Cothran, who have a new baby named Kaydence. Years ago Somerlyn worked at my newspaper, and we have been friends ever since. It’s always a pleasure…

Okay, some important points: Kirk got all the space booty, despite stunt doubles who didn’t look much like him. Star Trek was stuck in a weird “everything-has-to-be-right-side-up” thing that Star Wars seemed to defy Party tonight at Gene Roddenberry’s ghost’s house! My all-time favorite episode of any sci-fi show ever was the Star Trek in…

…and Abby’s was wicked cool. For a while my wife was into motorcycles. She once rode to Georgia for a Hog rally. To this day, she can still tell me everything about every Harley we pass, and loves to stop and look at them. This photo of her is from about 1996.

On another tab in this same web browser, I am reading a Thom Hogan article about how the 12-mega-pixel Nikon D3 isn’t “high resolution” enough, and you need to stitch at least two of its images together to make it truly “hi-res.” Seven years ago, the highest-resolution digital camera on the market was the Kodak…

Two things I thought were really funny tonight: Abby’s toe socks I found a watermelon I was out in the garden, pulling up some morning glory hay for the goats, when I discovered a large watermelon, obviously a volunteer from more than a year ago when we planted them. I think it’s strangely cool and…

Today the Chickasaw Nation Health Service “topped out” their new multi-million dollar health facility south of Ada (across the street from where Abby works, Pre-Paid Legal Services.) Before the actual raising of the beam, we were encouraged to sign it, “so that 200 years from now, when they tear this thing down, they’ll wonder who…

“I want a lap organ!” -Kindergarten letter to Santa Does it bother anyone else that “Santa” and “Satan” are so similar? Pork strudel + prescription fat blocker Hair pie cocktail Actual sign at house in Latta, Oklahoma, Winter 2000: “Free info on mind control.” Actual wet cement inscription, Latta, Oklahoma: “I, Harjo.” Actual sign in…

Okay, it apparently wasn’t enough that I saw a bobcat on the way to Wal Mart. Once I got there, things got much weirder. In the parking lot, I saw an old plastic laundry basket full of Tropicana juice bottles, apparently full of juice. The package on the light bulbs I was buying said, “select…

The local football scene here has been somewhat lackluster. Over the years, the area football programs shined, especially Ada’s, which boasts 19 state championships, 5 of which I covered. But this year, it’s just been on the slow side. Crowds are smaller and quieter. Teams that once dominated are faltering. One pleasant exception was last…

The same guy who used to complain all the time about everything (“ah, f**k, man!”) told me on one of our trips, “Rich, man, sometimes you have too many f**king opinions.” That’s probably true, but I don’t know why he thought he could tell me how many opinions I could have, and he probably had…

According to sources very close to the Giant Muh, the phrase “jump the shark” has, itself, jumped the shark, and should henceforth be replaced by “lleap the llama.” To the best of our knowledge here at Giant Muh, the Fonz never leapt a llama, alpaca, camel, vicuña, guanaco, or any other tylopod, but since llamas…

Also, as most of you who are not hung over know, Barack Obama was elected to be our next POTUS. Yay. Here are some interesting facts about yesterday’s election: Even though Abby and I voted in the same place and less than ten minutes apart, we did not see each other there. Abby would not…

I used to hang out with a guy who was super super negative all the time. His catch phrase was, “Ah, f*ck, man.” One time we were hiking a short, easy-to-navigate trail in Arizona. We were in a section of a wash that had about a million footprints, not a quarter of a mile from…

Preface: yes, I am fully aware that I talk too much about my garden, my gardening success, my beautiful fruits and vegetables, and how over-the-top cool it makes me. Hmm. Anyway, there was a frost warning Friday night when I got home from Utah, so I went out to harvest some of the better looking…

For the third time in less than a week, Buxton the Goat has gotten his head stuck in the fence. Presumably this is because his horns have grown too long and he doesn’t understand that his head doesn’t fit any more. Since he fights if you touch his horns, the only realistic way to free…

This morning editor Talina asked me if I had a picture of “Candy.” I assumed she wanted a picture of the radio DJ formerly known as Candy Matthews (who now just goes by her first name.) I was wrong; she wanted me to shoot a picture of a bowl of candy for the story to…