“Penis or rectum, that’s our dictum.” -N

-Der Fleder Melitus
-Milk Toga
-Melitus Rex
-Colt 49
-Horta Sapien
-Notebøk
-Inner Zonk (name of blacklight poster I had in 7th grade)

“I particularly dislike spiders that are rubbery or have no logical locomotion.” -R

Judith was a traitor with a lisp. Jethuth Chritht.

“Survey Says! …you’re all a bunch of f*cking idiots!” -Richard Dawson

Possible names for D’s first bøk…

-The Cruciflex Home Exerciser, a Manual
-Big ‘n’ Gay
-The Jethrene Integument
-Belch, the Throat Fart
-Enhugement of the Fisticons
-Crabby Old Bastard Mock F*ck
-The Future: When Monsters Roam the Earth
-My Ass Hurts
-97 Barely Disguised Haiku about Fisting

knuckles curl tightly
chasm, slickly vibrating
up to the elbow

another bag of
pus for your sweet enemy
open, smear, wipe clean

it’s lava twat chung
she steps into the bath house
gay men scream, scatter

“He has little bitty balls!” -Four Year Old

To the tune of Mr. Self Destruct by Nine Inch Nails…
(If you’re not a NIN fan, skip to the next question)

i am the noodle in your soup
(and you digest me)
i am the bean that makes you poop
(and you digest me)
i am the butcher
i’m the hog
i am the butter
in your nog

i take you to the porcelain seat
i make you not want to eat
i’ll cramp your gut i’ll break your heart
mr giant fart

Real product: New York brand European Style Texas Toast

Julio’s Tabouli Fingers

Overheard: “Perdy hot fer doags rot now.”

Butt vomit.

Voted most likely to be a mental patient, hillbilly or chimpanzee.

You’re a homogenoid!

“There’s nothing sexier than a fireman rolling hose.” -K
“Every time I come, I say ‘thank you’.” -K

-Poonta
-Throwing a booger out both pants legs
-His dick was as hard as Chinese trigonometry
-Peppered with salt and assaulted with pepper