“I find it ironic that Republicans (like Rick Santorum) are out there wanting less government and government intruding into our lives, but when it comes to moral issues they want government to legislate morality. It doesn’t work. It will never work.” ~Steven Hirsch, founder and co-chairman of Los Angeles-based Vivid Entertainment, one of the largest makers of erotic movies.
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I’m going to go back and rewrite the Bible to reflect the its practical application in today’s world by contemporary conservative Christians.
“And lo, Jesus and the disciples came unto Chili’s to quench their thirst and enjoy a casual dining experience at a family establishment. Todd, their waiter, was a feminine man and the disciples began to whisper amongst themselves. Jesus called the manager over, saying, ‘We request another waiter, for Todd likely sucks men’s penises and we do not want him touching our food.'”
Obviously, even mainstream Christians agree that Westboro Baptist Church is contrary to the actual intentions of Christ, but I believe that the greatest trick the Devil ever pulled (despite what some Kevin Spacey movies may say) was convincing evangelicals his goal should be theirs. In the old testament, Satan is sometimes referred to as “the accuser.” His job was to point out where we fell short. Who does that today? The church, mostly.
Let’s recap: Mainstream Christianity, by its own standards, has taken the role of Satan in the Bible.
Most Christians agree that God gave us free will. Ever since then, they’ve been trying to take it away based on the idea that if a “sin” is legal in society, people will believe it’s okay. As if the legal system is what we hold our own standards up to. In reality, all systems of standards are subpar to my own by default.
Sometimes it seems that the conservatives don’t believe people like Steven Hirsch should even be protected by the Constitution.