Nameless: Into the Void

Not only is it cool that there is beaver damage on our property, it is cool that I can say "beaver" in a post. Search engine, have at it.
Not only is it cool that there is beaver damage on our property, it is cool that I can say “beaver” in a post. Search engine, have at it.

While I was writing this, it turned into an all-purpose rant/repository for my angry notes.

Alternate title: The Lame Naming Scheme of Marketing

“Oh, yeah, bro. The XX-series is totally 2016. You should upgrade to the YY!”

Webworms: one of nature's top ten ways of saying, "screw you."
Webworms: one of nature’s top ten ways of saying, “screw you.”

And thus, marketing is born. Products are sold mostly on their perception, and much of that perception is muddled into deception by the use of model number, almost none of which have any correlation to the actual product.

I saw a shiftload of this when I was younger and into stereo systems. The names of components had nothing to do with their use or capabilities. It was based on how certain numbers sounded. A Marantz TC-5000 was neither anything “tc,” nor were any of its specifications “5000” anything.

I am reliving all this because I recently discovered a webizen from Great Britain, a bloke? chap? called Mat who runs techmoan.com, a site in which he collects and reviews old tech, mostly old audio tech, everything from 8-track tapes to Betamax video.

Also, I tried to figure out the latest lineup of mirrorless cameras and was flummoxed when I had to “sort by price high-to-low” to figure out which was a top model.

For many years, products, particularly cars, have included the letters “SX” in the model name or number because you can’t say “SX” without saying, “sex.”

While it’s true that I am annoyed by cameras being named irrelevantly, at least lens names make sense, mostly. While there is some hemming and hawing about ED, L-series, G, FD, etc., the bottom line of lens descriptions is very straightforward: focal length in millimeters, and the maximum aperture in f/number.

Okay, on with the other rantings. This won’t take long, but you might want grab a cup of covfefe to enhance the experience.

Another Fun Fact!
As I write this, the world is in the midst of a fairly rough flu season. You might not know that now is not the time to take vitamin supplements and eat nutritious foods. That was 6 months ago. The human immune system isn’t like a tank of gasoline that you fill up when it gets empty. It’s like a child’s mind that you nurture and nourish until it is fully functional.

 

Smoke can’t cause a sinus infection any more than water causes drowning. You have to put the two together.

Other fun medical fact: By the time a doctor says you have type II diabetes, half the beta cells in your pancreas are dead.

“Someone on the internet tonight told me I was ‘too eloquent.’ ” ~Journal, November 2000

I chose this image not because of its personal historical significance (it was one of the first photographs I ever made), but because it illustrates that a whole culture could, at one time, adopt something as stupid as puke green shag carpet, and everyone goes along with it.
I chose this image not because of its personal historical significance (it was one of the first photographs I ever made), but because it illustrates that a whole culture could, at one time, adopt something as stupid as puke green shag carpet, and everyone goes along with it.

A sudden, unprecedented groundswell of sexual abuse and sexual harassment accusations followed by some other distraction: does that sound like a step toward the truth, or history repeating itself?

In the pantry looking for pie filling, I see a can labelled “Beef Consummate,” and thought, “Bow chicka bow wow!”

A TD-V531? Pshaw. The TVC-15s are much better!
A TD-V531? Pshaw. The TVC-15s are much better!

Our dogs are made of the Biggs-Hoson, the so-called “dog particle.”

Beautiful women who claim to have low self-esteem: I don’t understand this narrative. You’re a demonstratively beautiful woman. (I know; beauty is subjective, and I tell myself that when I think a woman is beautiful, she is, because I get to define beauty.) I know you’re a bitch and got pregnant in high school and dropped out of three colleges on your father’s dime and fücked over a dozen nice guys and … hm. You know what. You’re right.

Sh!tbag? Am I using the word right?

“I’ll slap the taste right out of your mouth.” ~movie

The number one kind thing I do for my wife: put a blanket on her when I see that she’s cold. (I know this doesn’t belong in an angry rant, but I put it here for balance.)

“There was no blanket handy, so I built a pillowmid around myself and slept for two hours.” ~Journal, May 2001

Instead of Fixer Upper, I am watching a show on the Death Channel called Tearer Downer. It’s hosted by Trent Reznor.

Time and gravity always win. Always.
Time and gravity always win. Always.

Also, while I am blah blah blahing about this and that, I want to say that this is not a blog. I read recently that 95% of all blogs are abandoned. Add to that the fact that blog is short for web log, which this is not, and that most blog posts go, “Sorry I haven’t posted in so long, but quack quack quack.”

This is the web site you want to read to feel complete. It is the very first completenesssite. I’m sure that term will go viral five minutes after I click “publish.”

Me in 1985 with the Nikon FM with the 50mm f/1.2 and the FE-2 with the 105mm f/2.5. I know it’s the FM on the left side of the frame because it has the soft touch release, which didn’t fit the FM-2 of the FE-2. My beard was just a month old, and had never been trimmed.
Me in 1985 with the Nikon FM with the 50mm f/1.2 and the FE-2 with the 105mm f/2.5. I know it’s the FM on the left side of the frame because it has the soft touch release, which didn’t fit the FM-2 of the FE-2. My beard was just a month old, and had never been trimmed.

Wil C. Fry’s site isn’t a blog either. It is a site for getting that red pill shoved right down your latte-drinking throat. (See red pill/blue pill reference in handy search engine results using the same device you are using to read this.) And Anderson Conner’s site? F*ck me gently with a chain saw.

Question for the Taliban: have your actions ever resulted in the outcome you desire?

Question for child pornographers: have your actions ever resulted in the outcome you desire?

Question for people who call these people monster, perverts, bastards, or worse: have your actions ever resulted in the outcome you desire?

Walking a mile in the woods with my Wolfhound can definitely set a few things straight in my head. Utmost: why do we spend so much time and energy being mad at other people?
Walking a mile in the woods with my Wolfhound can definitely set a few things straight in my head. Utmost: why do we spend so much time and energy being mad at other people?
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4 Comments

  1. Well, you got me smiling, so I’ll call it a success.

    On mobile, my name/link is a single column of letters, which isn’t a complaint — I think it’s cool. And I thought it was ANTI-red pill? I’m not a big fan of pills, so I’m not sure. Except I pretend M&Ms are brain pills and eat them by the truckload — because my future self is probably a jerk and deserves whatever befalls him.

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